By
the title of this piece you’re probably thinking it’s an erudite, in-depth look
at print journalism through the decades and how it has affected all of our
lives, from “Dewey defeats Truman” through Watergate to present day treatises
on our divided population.
Nah.
I’m not smart enough to write that 5000 words of scholarly insomnia cure.
This
was an actual headline on the NY Post web site today:
Leonardo DiCaprio keeps his sunglasses
on indoors at Lakers game
I
searched the entire site but couldn’t find a follow-up article called:
Leonardo DiCaprio wears pants to Lakers
game
Of
course, what I really wanted was the scintillating story of:
Leonardo DiCaprio packs bag lunch to
Lakers game: egg salad and applesauce
What
has happened to our nation’s newspapers? How did an actor wearing sunglasses
indoors become a story? It wasn’t just a headline, there were several
paragraphs breathlessly detailing Leo’s entire sartorial ensemble. The writer’s
conclusion was he was wearing the sunglasses indoors to stay incognito. But
that didn’t work. Another celebrity, comedian Kevin Hart, spotted Leo right
away, giving him the secret Hollywood handshake and double wink of celebrity
Illuminati.
Where
was this headline:
Thousands watch Lakers game with doctor-prescribed
eyewear or contacts
Or
this:
Hundreds occasionally look up from
phones to watch moments of Lakers game
I’m
all for light hearted entertainment news, I read Entertainment Weekly. But this. This isn’t “news” of any kind. This
is an ego-centric douche wearing sunglasses indoors like ALL egocentric douches
do. It’s evolution. Once Leo was human, but with increasing fame and success he
metamorphosized to a clothes-wearing douche. Once that happened, the sunglasses
indoors were part of his DNA.
The
NY Post didn’t have to write about it, they chose to because journalism is
dead. The Post didn’t kill it, they just drove the knife in a little deeper.
