Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Wrong Turn

A couple of co-workers and I have been running over our lunch break for a few weeks. I know your first question is “Why would anyone do that?” I don’t have a good answer so let’s just move on.

Today we had to alter our route because our usual path was blocked by a road crew. So we turned right and took a way that led deeper into the city. Here are a few of the sights we encountered:

A woman wearing shorts that were WAY too short, a shirt that was WAY too tight and to top the ensemble off, fuzzy bedroom slippers. The color of the slippers did match her hair, so, there’s that.

A couple standing veryclose to each other and then suddenly walking in opposite directions. Pretty sure something illegal changed hands.

See above several more times.

Two obviously high individuals attempting to have a conversation about getting high. It wasn’t going well because they were already high. Way up there.

A photo shoot taking place in the parking lot of a small corner grocery store. I’m sure those pictures taken on a phone with a giant yellow-as-the-sun concrete wall as a backdrop will get the subject the job/date/blackmail victim she’s looking for.

Possibly saw a woman snort cocaine from her finger while driving.

Ran past a building that may have contained 1 or more dead bodies. All we know is a smell emanated from this structure that was indescribable. There was no oxygen available to breath that didn’t contain this odor that seared our nostrils and burned the tears from our eyes. Demons swept from the building and harassed us down the block carrying the smell with them like a burlap sack of rotting badgers.

We made it back to work and decided the next time we turn left.