Wednesday, January 30, 2013

What I did over Winter Vacation

I’ve been ignoring you my vast horde of half a dozen readers, but I have a good reason. I was finishing my first novel and frankly couldn’t be bothered with you. Don’t be offended. What’s it about, you ask? I said, what’s it about YOU ASK? Thank you, I’ll tell you.

Charles Mussenfuss is an out of work spoon bender who meets a girl in a bar. They fall in love and marry in a ceremony resplendent in pomp, circumstance and fine deli meats. Every thing is going along perfectly until Mary’s father announces that he isn’t human. He is a cyborg from the year 2345 who has come back to rid the Earth of transient parakeets, of which Mary has 346.

Chapter 2 finds the world devoid of small birds. Charles and Mary settle into married life which is wonderful until, without small birds to eat, the big ones like hawks and eagles start attacking humans for food. Mary loses three toes but Charles defends himself well developing a taste for screech owls.

Chapters 3-106 Character back story.

Chapter 107 This chapter is kind of a mess, may have to rewrite it. All the characters’ names changed to Glenn for some reason.

Chapter 108 The parakeets are back and Charles and Mary live happily ever after in the forests of Delaware with their cyberdog Muffin.

Well, that’s it. The novel is called “Whatever Happened to Sanity?”

Ok, the truth is I was working on a novel and have finally finished the first draft. It’s a horror story which is not my normal subject matter for this blog so I thought I’d have some fun. Say goodnight Charles and Mary.

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