Mike
Bloomberg is not running for president.
Let
that sink in.
This
means we only have Howard Schultz. We only have one fatuous billionaire to not
vote for on the Democratic ticket in 2020.
How
are we going to get through the election cycle with only one narcissistic,
out-of-touch, ignorant, bloviating, pontificating, flatulent, misguided,
egocentric, shit-for-brains, fuckwit billionaire to mock and spew our bile at?
We’re doomed.
This
is the American form of democracy. It all breaks down if billionaires aren’t
trying to buy the presidency. I know that the rest of the 73 candidates are
likely millionaires. So what? A millionaire compared to a billionaire is like
watching the Andy Griffith Show after
Don Knotts left or requesting to listen to heavy metal music and they play Bon
Jovi. It’s not the same.
We
need more clueless, unwanted, nefarious, criminal, uncaring, pettifogging,
arrogant, oily, humorless, morally bankrupt assclown billionaires to revile and
send home to cry in their bitcoins.
CNN,
MSNBC, FOX and other news outlets have hours of airtime to fill with the
recitation of stupid ideas, made up stories, false equivalencies and lies
wrapped in prevarication. Who better to present this literally unbelievable
information than billionaires who haven’t spoken to a regular American since
they excoriated the parking valet at their private club for leaving a palm
print on their Bugatti.
The
Democrats are going to run a thousand different candidates up the flag pole to
see which one can flap in the breeze strong enough to defeat Captain Meathead
in 2020. More of them need to be billionaires to show us definitively who not
to vote for, who can’t run the country, and who needs to hide away in their
mansion and shut the hell up.
