The other day I watched a movie called Invisible Invaders.
It was made in 1959 starring B movie stalwart John Agar and some other "so-you-think-you’re-an-actor"
actors. I love these 1950s sci if movies. There's something about them that
speaks to me, but let's be honest, on a competence level these are adults
working at about a 3rd grade level.
This blog contains spoilers so if you were planning on
watching this masterpiece on a special occasion in your warm pajamas with some
soft brie cheese and a box of your favorite wine, stop reading NOW.
Invisible Invaders tells the heart warming story of a race
of aliens that took over Earth's moon and now live there. Earthlings, with
their rockets and nuclear bombs and easy bake ovens have become too advanced so
they decide to conquer us. This is all told in one dull blob of exposition by
one of the aliens to an Earth scientist. The alien is actually invisible but it
inhabits the dead body of a scientist who’s played by John “I briefly had a
respectable career” Carradine. The alien gives the scientist 24 hours to
convince the world to surrender or be destroyed.
For some reason we humans refused to believe there were
ancient invisible aliens living on the moon who wanted to enslave us. Go
figure. The invasion begins with the aliens inhabiting dead bodies to wreak
havoc on the world. They do this by setting fires and blowing up bridges and
buildings. This being a film shot on a budget of $85 and a can of cheeseballs,
this is all shown as zombies walking slowly on a sound stage followed by cut-in
stock footage of firemen fighting a blaze or something blowing up. This movie
is only 68 minutes long and 15-20 minutes is borrowed from other sources. The
same images are used repeatedly. Intense, quality film making.
Something that bothered me was why they needed to inhabit
the bodies at all. The John Carradine alien made a huge deal about them being
invisible, so why make themselves visible? Why not pull all of your shenanigans
while invisible? No explanation is given for this little question.
Eventually John Agar’s army major and two scientists end up
locked in a military facility to protect themselves from the radioactive alien
zombies. The scientists are tasked with finding a way to fight the aliens. The
smarter of the two (and that’s not saying much since the other one has the IQ
of a sea anemone) needs to study one of the aliens but that means capturing
one. To engage this plan, John Agar needs to go outside among the radioactivity
so he dons his protective suit which is a pair of painters’ pants and a bee
keepers’ mask.
The first attempt to catch an alien goes awry so a second
attempt is made. Agar has to take the dumber scientist out with him. When the
doctor protests that there’s only one radiation suit, Agar assures him that the
cab of the truck will protect him. I was expecting a thick, heavy military
vehicle with a lead-lined cab. Nope, it’s Grandpa’s pick-up truck, the one he
uses to transport the chickens to market. And let’s say for argument’s sake it does
protect you from radiation, when Agar opens the door to get out, aren’t you now
negating the protection by allowing radiation inside? Yes. Yes, you are.
The movie goes on for a while longer, ends abruptly and
stupidly with more useless stock footage and sub plots never resolved. The
important thing to remember though is that after the inevitable nuclear
holocaust, the earth will be repopulated by the only survivors: painters, bee
keepers and Ford F-150 owners. Very sad.
