Nitwits

Nitwit #1 Jim Cramer

Jim Cramer, whose CNBC show might as well be renamed “Oily Man Yells Nonsense at You For an Hour”, believes that he knows how we all feel about President Obama. In a discussion with Joe “I Was a Congressman So I’m Smarter than You” Scarborough, he said:

“When Americans hear health care reform, it just means tax increases. Until we get the economy moving again, I think everybody wishes that Obama would just kind of go away for a little bit.”

You want the most powerful man in the world, the most visible man in the world, and the elected leader of this country . . . to just go away for awhile. With the economy in ruins, the major car companies going bankrupt, the health care system out of control, the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, the unrest in Iran over the elections, the never ending disputes between Israelis and Palestinians, North Korea threatening the world with nuclear weapons, etc., you think Obama . . . should just go away. And this isn’t just your postulation. You believe we, the American people, also want him to go away.

Yes Jim, you have your thumb on the pulse of the American people. Wait, that’s right, your thumb is up your ass because you’re a shouting, sweating, prevaricating buffoon. Roll your damn shirt sleeves down you braying jackass and stop acting like you do your TV show to help people. You do it because you get paid an obscene amount of money to give bad investment advice and play a keyboard of morning radio DJ farting noises. You, Jim, are who the American people would like to just go away.

Nitwit #2 Representative John Culbertson

From Twitter, tweeted by Culbertson:

Good to see Iranian people move mountains w social media, shining sunlight on their repressive govt – Texans support their bid for freedom

Oppressed minorities include House Repubs: We are using social media to expose repression such as last night’s D clampdown shutting off amends.

I was walking through the supermarket parking lot the other day and I thought I recognized the driver getting out of a beat up Toyota Celica as millions of Iranians taking to the streets in protest of their sham election and fighting for freedom with some paying with their lives to defy Iran’s supreme leader who continues to threaten them with death if they don’t lie down like lambs and accept the false election results. But then I realized it was just Republican Texas representative John Culbertson going in for some corn pads and a lottery ticket. They look so much alike and their struggles are eerily similar.

Much like the Iranians who live in an oppressive environment forced to accept whatever bile Ayatollah Khameini spews forth and to be ruled by whichever lunatic he picks to be president, Representative Culbertson lives in a big house, gets paid an exorbitant amount of money for which he does nothing useful, gets free healthcare for life for he and his family, can say anything about the president without fear of physical torture and has freedom of religion, thought, satellite TV shows and ice cream flavors.

So you see, it was an honest mistake.